Caffeine Cleanse


 I chose to cleanse my system of caffeine for 2 days.  The only caffeine I consume is in the form of coffee.  Morning of Day one, I was resentful – Why should I have to give this up?  I love my morning coffee!  It’s not that bad for me – I NEED it to get through my morning.  Once the morning was underway, I felt so calm at my desk.  I had a lot of work to do, but I didn’t feel anxious or excited about it.  I felt this sense of a rhythm and presence to my work.   I didn’t have my typical morning – peeing every 20 minutes, shaky, sweaty, burpy.  Clearly, I have been consuming more caffeine than my body can handle.  At the end of the day, driving home, I did not feel anxious behind the wheel.  I felt very pleasant.  It made me wonder why I have to be going 300 mph in order to do my job – as if I was somehow more productive.  In fact, it makes me more distracted and wanting to do 3 things at once. 


Thus, my initial morning of resentment, turned into a day of calm, ease & presence.  I loved it so much that I decided to forego caffeine for a second day!  I still “woke up”, and, again, I didn’t miss the anxiety, I felt much more able & willing to listen to people, and my thoughts weren’t as uncontrollable.


This morning I had a small cup of coffee and felt immediately cracked out – I became a complete chatterbox and felt compelled to anxiety.  I’m unsure of my relationship with coffee at this point – I still love the smell and the taste, but I am taking a good hard look at how it can invoke anxiety and an attention deficit.  Perhaps coffee becomes a treat, rather than a daily practice, so that I appreciate the power of this drug.


2 thoughts on “Caffeine Cleanse

    • Well, I’ve been consuming caffeine through tea, which has been much more mild. I had a small cup of coffee today and I’m OK. I think I just needed to moderate the consumption.

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